The Green Goblin & Tight Trousers Strike Canada – Day 4

On Day 4, when Kate Middleton emerged for royal duties in Dolce & Gabbana, royal watchers anxiously waited to see if her dress had the design’s enormous hideous giant pocket watch patch.

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Thankfully, Kate avoided the Atlantic City-style Alice in Wonderland embellishment, leaving William’s short and overtly snug trousers as the day’s most visually surreal clothing element.

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Seriously, I am so tired of seeing Prince William’s khaki penis whiskers.  Don’t look too closely if you feel like you’re going to throw up a little in your mouth, but one of his balls is being squeezed like a pimple and that can’t be comfortable.

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The color of Kate’s dress was a very royal tour shade of green, known to everyone who has almost choked  to death  from car freshener fumes in the back of a taxi cab as Royal Pine.

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I put a red vertical line over this screen grab to illustrate what a disservice Kate does to herself with her quest to over-tailor everything to the point of constriction because she doesn’t think that we get yet that she’s skinny.  The askew buttons ruined the front of her £2,000 designer frock.

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The poorly fitted 1940s-style dress made me wonder if Kate also shares my dream of a full-out 1990s Kinderwhore revival, but Kate’s choice of sedate nude LK Bennett court shoes and clutch made me realize with great sadness that the only figure from 1993 Kate will ever channel is Married… with Children bank manager Marcy D’Arcy, not Courtney Love.

Not that we were ever going to see plastic poodle barrettes and heroin needles poking out out of Kate’s extensions anyway, but ffs, sex this thing up a little.  Between Kate’s so-called wardrobe malfunctions, Prince William’s ball floss trousers and two children, we know they’re anatomically correct and likely use their genitals, Kate could go a little naughty with the shoes or bag.  Maybe even a berry-stained lip.  Just something to hint her next patronage won’t be at the Celibacy Library where every book is filled with only pure thoughts.

The first half of the day’s events were spent in Kelowna, British Columbia where they watched a volleyball game at the University of British Columbia.  Grand Chief Stewart Phillip was set to attend but pulled out last-minute again, renewing his protest and was replaced by Chief Jonathan Kruger at the event.  The Cambridges gathered up more gifts and worked the crowd according to this Emily Nash Tweet.

en-ubc

Huh, so they do “work”.  Then the Green Goblin and Tight Trousers headed to a food tasting festival at Mission Hill Winery where they ate some penis clam.  Raw.

penisclam

Yeah, when I first saw these things at a market in Seattle, I just assumed they were for some kind of black magic rituals to hex ex-boyfriends.  They’re actually even more traumatizingly flesh-colored once washed off and are supposed to be delicious, just unfortunate looking, but no.  Just no.

I do like to call attention to the positive and Prince William genuinely did seem at times to want to create memorable moments yesterday with those who had gathered which is the closest thing I can find for a point for these types of  events so well done, Tight Trousers.

ea-williamsitting

While the Cambridges cut some pinot noir grapes, there was no mention in the press about a proper wine tasting, just that Kate drank cassis and passed on the whiskey.  (UPDATE: According to reader and area resident, Arlene, they did do a private wine-tasting, no press was allowed though.)  Then they flew up to Whitehorse in the  Yukon where it was unreasonably cold for September.  When I Googled temps at 2:45pm EST, it was 34°F (1°C).

Kate slipped on a Hobbs coat and carried a maple leaf tartan scarf.  At the airport, they were greeted by Canadian Rangers and Junior Rangers.  The Lone Ranger was a no-show.

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Then they headed to the Kwanlin Dun Cultural Centre to watch some performances.

Day 5 is already underway so with only three more days to go, this tour might wind up being historically noteworthy as the first official royal tour Kate has pulled off without having a significant wardrobe malfunction.  34-year-old duchesses grow up so fast.

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186 thoughts on “The Green Goblin & Tight Trousers Strike Canada – Day 4”

  1. The press here in Kelowna reported that they attended a private wine-tasting in the cellar of Mission Hill Winery. No reporters, photographers, or the public were allowed.

    Love your blog!

        1. That’s so cool you’re an editor! And thank you! I have one novel written which I’ve decided needs a little more work before I try to publish and several projects I’m working on simultaneously. I keep coming up with ideas, I have the exact opposite of writer’s block. The good thing about that though is once you return to something you’ve set down for a while, it offers fresh perspective. The mystery novel is getting a major overhaul, I’ve made the motives far too complicated to the point the ghost some blame for the grisly events is the life raft of rationality to which readers would cling.

          1. That’s wonderful that you never have writer’s block — the sign of a true writer. Yes, it’s always a good idea to put one’s writing away for a while, then take it out and look at it with fresh eyes. That’s why an editor is a good idea — they’ll examine the story with a fresh perspective and also very critically. And it sounds like the mystery novel has a lot going on! Are you self-publishing or hoping to find an agent and publisher?

      1. Dear Lola,
        Did you notice what Kate did at the “children’s party” in Canada ? Some of the videos are more edited than others, but I saw a video of Kate at the party doing a few strange things {no surprise}. She literally stole a balloon from the balloon man, ! and shoved it at Charlotte. No “please” or “thank you” to the balloon man. Kate exhibited all the grace of a wild monkey stealing something for her young. And what was Charlotte supposed to do with the unfilled balloon ? Blow it up ? Kate has a lack of manners and grace, her children are getting a rotten example.
        The other thing Kate did during the party, not just the bizarre squatting but was also lifting the hem of her dress up and down on her knees while squatting, as if giving a peep show.
        Perhaps a full video of the event is on YouTube or elsewhere. Some videos I’ve seen of the children’s party have been edited though.

  2. Laughing. So. Hard. Everyone in the office looking askance. Wait till I show them! Until then, busting a gut like nobody’s listening and I don’t care. Lola, I love you!!

  3. Laughing so hard I am crying! Thanks Lola, because otherwise I would be vomiting at the closeup of the royal jewels.

    1. Thanks! Be thankful I didn’t screen grab from the more revealing image directly above. Even though William was putting it all out there so it’s fair game, the aggressive manner in which the pants were digging into the jewels looked so tortuous, I felt squeamish.

    2. I showed the crotch shot photo to my husband. He couldn’t believe William wears such tight pants. Something about bunching and adjusting…I stopped listening.

    1. Well Sassy, Kate did provide detailed directions to her nipples with those darts, so it’s only fair that William gets to show off his bits too.

    2. Maybe William is trying to keep up with Kate’s antics ? After all she wore that red coat with the “nipple buttons”. Mainly her past antics were the worst, but she’s been “fairly” tame for a while now {thankfully fewer dress blowing up in the wind + no underwear incidents these days}.

  4. The sideways pull on that green dress is driving me crazy just looking at it. I don’t know how she wasn’t tugging at it constantly. Given the way she plays with her hair, it’s not like she’s averse to having her hands busy with her ensemble. I also think it’s so snug that the look is no longer as flattering as it could be.

    1. The cynic in me says it’s because their PR people don’t want pregnancy rumours to start. Or non-pregnancy rumours. Kate has one sip of wine, and the rumours start flying. Plus, it was astonishing enough to see her actually put food in her mouth. I guess they don’t want us to completely die of shock.

      1. During the India/Bhutan tour, they did some private events which garnered negative press regarding their treating the tour like a publicly funded private holiday. This could be more of the same, they’re just trying to keep their personal indulgences a little more contained this time.

    2. Probably. No kidding, I’m not being mean, they used to literally “get pissed” in public before she finally {and almost didn’t} get that engagement ring.

  5. Wear the scarf, don’t carry it. Not a difficult lesson to learn. It is like she wants to have reasons not to shake people’s hands.

    Lola, do you ever do NaNoWriMo, just to get a first draft of a story?

    http://www.nanowrimo.org/

          1. Thanks, I enjoy it a lot. It basically consumes every spare moment during November, but it also shakes off the writing cobwebs a little and surprises me with the creativity it yields.

            1. It does. It forces you to just write write write, get it out instead of editing and second guessing as you go.

    1. Kate’s habit of carrying her scarf bugs me too. Has no one told her that a scarf will keep her warm if she wears it around her neck?

        1. If Kate had only turned over the page on her briefing notes she would have seen the following instructions…
          Page one says? “Take a scarf with you…”

          Page two continues? “…You may want to wear it if it gets cold”

          If only there had been a “Pippatips” on scarves to help her out?

  6. I sometimes look through the Gettys images to see photos of these two that are less photoshopped and more candid. I get the feeling that things are anything but good behind the scenes, in repose when they think the cameras are not on them, they look fairly miserable and some of their body language has looked a bit icy to me.

    http://www.gettyimages.co.nz/detail/news-photo/catherine-duchess-of-cambridge-and-prince-william-duke-of-news-photo/610813018#catherine-duchess-of-cambridge-and-prince-william-duke-of-cambridge-picture-id610813018

    http://www.gettyimages.co.nz/detail/news-photo/catherine-duchess-of-cambridge-and-prince-william-duke-of-news-photo/610813126#catherine-duchess-of-cambridge-and-prince-william-duke-of-cambridge-picture-id610813126

    http://www.gettyimages.co.nz/detail/news-photo/catherine-duchess-of-cambridge-and-prince-william-duke-of-news-photo/610813132#catherine-duchess-of-cambridge-and-prince-william-duke-of-cambridge-picture-id610813132

    The pressure is only going to grow on them as they are pushed to become full time royals. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if one day they decided to give up the throne and retire into private life. And even if they don’t give it up voluntarily, I think the changing demographics of the UK will see the monarchy gone once the queen has passed on. I think we are seeing the last days of the royal family, I give it 10-15 more years at the most.

    1. Thanks for the links! While it seems Prince William doesn’t want the job, I just can’t see him walking away from the perks. He is notorious for not liking to spend his own money but isn’t exactly frugal when it comes to the taxpayers. I think William will wind up being the last king.

      1. Yes, I know what you mean about the perks being too enticing to give up, and until this tour I also felt they would hang on until the bitter end, but just looking at these two at the moment, the perks may not be enough once they are required to do their royal duties on a daily basis.

        These two have had a lot of freedom since their marriage, and a bit of part time royal work has not made their lifestyle suffer too much, but once their freedom is curtailed and they don’t have the time to enjoy the perks because their time is being taken up with royal duties, I’m just not sure how appealing the royal cage will be at that stage, no matter how gilded. Time will tell!

    2. Those are great finds! Not the happy, healthy, youthful pair their fans insist they are. No hyper-photoshop blur tool on these images.

    3. The Cambridges quitting is a dream dear to my heart, but I won’t hold my breath. But I’ll keep dreaming….

    4. Thanks for the awesome ‘real deal’ pictures, Antipodean. These are not even happy little lovebirds and it would take a blowtorch to melt the ice between them. I find it very odd that a couple who obviously play happy sappy to the cameras would want to have another baby, I don’t think that’s fair to a child. And the pictures of Billy’s sperm shooter is repulsive, and to know there are worse ones is disturbing. Maybe he is waity’s ‘proxy’ flasher. He flashes, she gets a new dress, or bangle, or a great big picture of Ben for her very own. Maybe even have pillow cases with his image on it made for her. (is that legal?) Utterly ridiculous and outrageously expensive and pointless tour. (Seriously Billy, the best you could do for the refugees was ‘good luck?)

  7. Pictures are out of another coat. ..this one has big buttons on the breasts and down the coat. Good grief.

    They lugged the kids there. Any guess when they might be sprung ? I thought the point was to show them off a bit.

  8. “One of his balls is being squeezed like a pimple.” Guffaws!!!

    I felt hopeful for that green dress until I saw the insipid beige shoes of doom. Good grief, she’s devoid of any imagination.

      1. Yeah i saw! The new shoes go well with a school uniform. Or if you trim the heels and put spikes, they’ll make great golf shoes.

  9. Something that really disturbs me is how aggressive, vicious and plain rude the 4 Press/Communications Officers and their paid trolls have become these days in DM comments section. Comments like, “Shut up, you fool!” (Direct quote.)

    And references to those who object and can see W&K beyond the false personas put out, as being ‘less than’ in any number of ways. Really nasty, bullying tones.

    A journalist who isn’t restricted by their company’s relations with KP, who cares about the truth should take note of the worst slurs and write an article about it and expose the insincere anti-bullying stance W&K are taking, simply to serve their own purposes. It’s very, very low.

    1. What’s worse is how the paid employees are up voting their own positive comments. This is very easily done with a simple automated bot. It’s not clear on every article but on some it’s super apparent which comments have been planted.

  10. Lola, your work is always fantastic – we definitely share a sense of humour and joy of sarcasm – but this has to be my favourite post to date! Love it!

  11. Yep folks doesnt the truth hurt ..they cant handle the truth
    feel like tom cruise quote in that old film he did
    They both are lack lustre in every way all she can do is show off her legs cant communicate properly as is never grown into a fully fledged adult … very stunted boring and shouldnt be in this very priviliged position … the green hideous dress ugh.. really didnt think tailoring was done correctly on this .. and why all the while wear this clutch bag like a security blanket like a baby does ..
    its really not a royal trip its just them on a vacation posing at every turn for the camera …..look at me … agh…….

  12. Ouch that article! What W&K have not realised yet is that you cannot have your cake and eat it when being a royal. Once the press and undoubtedly the public have decided to reduce their interest in you there is little in the way of getting that back. The public have given Prince Harry a rough ride over the years what with his misdemeanours etc, however, with the huge amount of work that he has done in recent years with regards to Invictus and Sentebale the public now see him for what he is hence the rise in his popularity. Harry now stands behind the Queen and infront of W&K AND Charles in terms of popularity. I really do believe that once the Queen has passed (god forbid) that W will decide that he no longer wants the role and will abdicate. If we take the precedence of Edward VIII, when he renounced his title it was legalised that none of his children would be able to claim rights to the sovereignty/throne, so I suspect that although they have already been born both George and Charlotte would fall foul of this too.

    1. I agree with you Melinda…I’ve thought that now for awhile…they might be slowly grooming him for the job…but who knows. W and K seem to be picking up more events so they might be half trying half heartedly to pacify the queen.

    2. Carole will not allow William to abdicate; she wields influence over the dolt and has put too much work into this royal malarkey to lose it all. William will do as he’s told, even if he doesn’t know he’s being told. The best thing for George and Charlotte would be for the monarchy to end. They would be gawked at, yes, but hopefully both could become whatever they want in life, whatever their abilities (and endless wealth and influence) provide. Hopefully both kids have enough spunk to resist the influence of their parents and most of their combined families. From recent sightings eg pretend play-date, aka photo op for Kate and William, George looks like he’s already worked out that he has dud parents.

      1. 100% agree Kitty…..The Lizard Queen has waited to long for “position of power “. When the Queen is gone Mommy Dearest, W&K will run all over Charles. I also feel sorry for whomever Harry marries.

  13. Maybe he likes it when his balls are squeezed like pimples. As for Kate, she can’t do a little naughty. It’s all or nothing for her. She’d be flying her thong in the wind like a freak flag.

    1. I really think that waity was warned big time not to dare flash on this tour, and I thought that from when I first heard of it. I don’t know what was said or by whom of course but no flying hair for the most part and dresses however ugly and silly pretty much flash proof. I suppose she could have used that Valentine’s day tablecloth patterned (description a combination of other posters thoughts) one to squeak a one in, but it was made longer than the original. Maybe waity is sticking to her ‘don’t expect me to do the same thing every year and adding every tour to it’.

    2. But what thong ? Do you think she bothers with a thong ? From the photos I’ve seen, she wears <<>>, and it’s horrifying.

  14. They just released pics of the kids party. Not a play date an all out party. Couple of things I noticed:
    Waity in her attempt to be Uber mom squatting down in heels and dress nearly gave us all a full view. She wears pants to a walk thru town but chasing the kids she wears dress and heels…idiot, whoever thought that was a swell idea should be fired. I think your right she was spoken to about flashing…probably in the car when the queen drove her to her hunting picnic at Balmoral. ..queen gives kate and carol rides…and probably a stern talk about wearing underpants. And btw carol did you not teach your daughter this ?
    I aldo noticed from the pics, George and his sister are not Interacting with any other kids…just W and K and other adults…wth? George was more social as a non talking infant in Australia. His sister has the same baby jowls that kate had…if you go back and look at the picture of her being held by Carol on her Christening day…widely published. Char. Looks to be mostly kate as a baby in the looks dept. The only other thing that bothered me was the DM reporting that the child was bouncing on a rather good natured large dog…Ouch poor dog! Please tell me her parents stopped her from torturing said mut. I wonder if Lupo puts up with that. ..kind of think not. The outfit kate had on aside from being a dress at a kid romping party…was not IMO anything that did her any favors even if she wore it at a charity. For whatever reasons these kids are not leaving victoria house grounds. Which makes me wonder about security threats.

  15. Bless his heart.
    Chris Jackson (aka the golden boy, Tash’s boyfriend ) has just Instagramed his pleasure at so many papers using his photos from the PG, PC play date. If you are one of the few photographers (only one?) there then your photos will be the only ones available for the papers to use, right Chris?

    1. Let’s talk about how *Canadian* print reporters from the *host nation* weren’t allowed into the event (I’m Canadian). This is the real story. Their arrogance knows no bounds.

    1. I so love this comment – Le Tour de Bore – couldn’t have put it better myself…. Shame it seems to be the way for every tour that Chopper & Chutney do…..

  16. well i think we can definitely all agree – this woman is clearly clueless…..
    the day before yesterday she is on a town walkthrough and wear jeans. then at a childrens tea party she wears a cream dress yesterday….and then today wears another pair of jeans that leaves little to the imagination whilst canoeing…..
    someone seriously has no common sense at all as to how to dress – just unsure as to whether it is K or her PA/come stylist…..

    1. But, Melinda, if she had worn something appropriate to the children’s event, the sugary bloggers would not have been able to breathlessly praise her for being the first mother ever – EVER! – to wear white to a playdate. Mummy clothes are for the plebes you know.

      1. Lol. I completely agree but given this nearly ended up in a ‘bottom’ moment, once would have hoped she would have realised how stupid she would look.

  17. I had to kugh at this…so much being made of George not shaking hands on the tarmac. ..if it wasn’t for his age, my kids said he looks like he us giving the loser sign -LOL

    http://pin.it/Ufxf73Y

    Hopefully this link works

    1. Sorry texting again…everyone on here must know by now I live on my phone and am horrid at texting… apologies!
      …should have read I had to laugh*

  18. Where are the new posts? I’ve been on LLH withdrawal for a few days now?! 🙂

    I have been looking forward to the loud, unapologetic snickers this site produces… and have been in limbo…

    Alex

  19. I didnt want to be nasty but I immediately notice his “pant’s region”. I tough it was just me until I continue reading lol. Nice post!

  20. I have also read in the press that they were very rude to the staff in the small hotel they stayed in. It was reported that they didn’t thank the staff, declined to have a photo taken. Their specially cooked meals were delivered to their rooms but taken by their staff to give to them.No one really saw them. When they came to leave they just swept through reception without a word. All these points were made by the manager of the hotel. They are just awful people. Good manners cost nothing

    1. Matty, do you have the link to the article?
      Their behaviour is rude to the max; shame it is not documented and spat out in a widely-circulated article. You are right, courtesy to others costs nothing. It also signals the measure of a person. And these two don’t measure up in any worthwhile way that I can see.

      1. Geez, especially since they renovated the fvking room for them. I can’t stand them! Didn’t someone mention Kate had her hair stylist when they were climbing some steps and the stylist retouched her hair halfway up……..what a arrogant ‘itch.

      2. Kitty, did you see the less-edited version of the video of the children’s party ? Some of the videos are more complete than others.
        Talk about rude and entitled ! Kate snatched an unfilled balloon from the balloon artist and shoved it at Charlotte. The man had a supply bag and from the way it appeared in the video, Kate just helped herself. No “may we” ? or “thank you”. It was all so quick and sorry-looking, you could easily imagine Kate as a kleptomaniac. Not sure why she thought Charlotte needed a flat balloon, either.

        1. No, WaityWatcher, I missed that. How appalling. I am guessing Kate was playing to cameras and needed another prop, apart from her daughter.

  21. No I haven’t got a link. Since I posted my comment I have remembered it wasn’t in the press. I saw it on Royal Dish. If you want to find it you will have to scroll up in the section William and Kate. Hope I’m correct and you find it. You may be able to post the link.

  22. Some stupid newspaper (can’t recall which one now) referred to Kelowna as a “remote little town.” That really got my ire up. Kelowna is one of the most prosperous, thriving cities in Canada, the third largest in British Columbia and growing faster than almost anywhere else in Canada because of the incredibly warm, arid climate in the Okanagan Valley and wine country that rivals Napa Valley. Plus gorgeous scenery and lots to do from skiing to boating to endless hiking. If people are going to write about a place, they owe it to their readers to do their homework. True journalism seems to be a lost cause these days.

  23. Thank you Notasugar for providing this link
    I read through it and the manager also said that even though food had been prepared and sent up to them, they sent out for pizza. How very very rude is that?

    1. She skipped a scheduled event in NYC, ordered in several NYC-style pizzas to the room, then managed to make it to the event with famous people. Skipped the event with everyday types, never too tired to see Patrick Stewart and the high-up female exec at JCrew (both of whom were at the event she did bother to attend).

      1. Thanks for some additional info about her Royal Rudeness. Was any of this reported in the press or just known in NYC at the time of their visit.
        I still cannot get over the arrogant way she walked off after that poor boy had given her the flowers when they were getting on the sea plane. To just hold them out fully expecting someone to take them.,and carry on walking flicking her hair. I just wish that Navy guy hadn’t dashed up and taken the flowers. Not his job Miss Stuck Up. Then the poor boy was dragged away. Horrible woman…. Spoilt child really.

          1. OMG! I had to comment on this because I hadn’t seen it and I am absolutely flabbergasted. It seems like that’s all they do and I have to wonder if anyone will talk to them about this?

          2. Oh my. Seems like there should have been some training for that kind of thing. And the poor little boy watched her do it!

        1. The navy guy looks like one of the equerries attending them everywhere as if they were LIWs. Note to Kate, this is why you need an official LIW. Unlike other tours, Rebecca has not been acting as a LIW this tour. It’s the reason the GG and another canadian official’s wife were helping Kate’s walkabout and taking her flowers, gifts and bags.

          Further, if you get to the end of the clip, you notice that he starts to walk towards the plane with the flowers after standing back to allow a clear shot of them departing.

          I’d go as far as saying he would join them in the plane or just before door is closed because that’s the direction he is headed.

          1. I did have another look at that clip. Yes he’s holding the flowers in a downward position while making his way in the direction of the plane. Still doesn’t excuse her Royal Rudeness, the way she acted.

          2. The flower thing at the airport isn’t egregious or rude when seen from another angle.

            Here is a video of entire departure from a different angle.

            https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RHWRx0Wnc4I&feature=youtu.be&t=1m5s

            Specifically pay attention to the background people at 2.30

            As WK are saying their goodbyes, their KP support staff are lined up on the ramp behind and over Kate’s shoulder. Miguel Head and Rebecca Deacon are easily identifiable)

            At 2.35 they start to move single file to the plane, but they are popping into the building on Kate’s side of the pier to get to the plane discreetly – WK + kids have to be the last passangers to board.

            When Kate receives the flowers, she fully expects someone from the team to still be standing to the side.

            The Equerry is the last in the line of people heading towards the building from the ramp and he detours to take the flowers. From the original angle, it looked like Kate was simply holding out the flowers hoping that someone would get the message, but from this angle, it took the equerry that long to reach her. As a result, it looks like she could care less for the flowers, and dumped them on a random navy guy who came to her rescue.

            From the widely circulated video, we know the equerry with the flowers follows them directly and he must have walked/run really fast because at 5.30 in this video, there he is, ahead of them, holding the flowers.

            We don’t see any of the team actually embarking the plane, but I think it’s a fairly good assumption that the flowers (and equerry) made it to the plane.

            1. OK, but did you see her shove George aside ?! Wow.
              Take another look, she does that at the beginning of the video.

              1. She does, but he isn’t moving and is creating a pile up. She could have moved him along better.

                Yet i also blame William here for being unaware of G. William tries to reach for C to make Kate’s exit from the car easier. It’s a pile up in that car exit and G gets shoved aside to make room when William could have realised straight away that Kate wasn’t going to let go of C and the super mum narrative/ photo op with C that she is intent on role playing.

                1. I appreciate the pile-up, but I agree that she could have moved George along better. I felt a twinge inside when I saw the look on his face. It was confusion and then disappointment, which made me really sad. He looked truly lost for a moment. He doesn’t seem like a very happy child, which is too bad since his smile is such a winner.

      2. Notasugarhere, When was this in NY? Did they stop over or was this when she w as pregnant with Charlotte?

        1. Yes, it was during the NYC trip she tagged along on when expecting. Couldn’t do other work because of “HG” but could fly to NYC to giggle at the 9/11 Memorial wearing her shocking pink coat, hang with stars, and meet Beyonce.

  24. Think waity is so rude ..on that play date all she did was talk to charlotte and ignore military wives .. disgraceful
    its just been 8 days of fashion parading and not once have they promoted BRF all they do is talk to kids
    all they do period is demand no photos in hotel in Whitehorse and demand privacy all the while … have no patience with this show biz family ..they certainly dont act Royal only act snobbish to people around them

  25. £62,000 pounds on waitys outfits for ho,iday tour of canada..
    it certainly wasnt a Royal Tour that used to take place ..They have just done loads of refresh her makeup hair and clothes changes for photo opportunities of her ..
    She thinks she shouldnt be doing speaking roles .All we see is her constantly parading smiling guffawing and yet again flashed to the public bending down in inappropriate dress
    ugh.. think its been just ghastly. .

    1. Yes me too ..thought what is so very odd with Waity is that she doesnt interact with the people that were around her.. She only spoke to charlotte and spoilt George. .. They dont talk to other children who were looking at them but they didnt know how to act properly. . They both are so odd with them they are over pampered in every way downright ignorant with people around them that is what I saw on play group video in garden
      By plane leaving she pushed George out of the way so she got a good camera shot of herself again all about her … Ugh….

  26. Looking forward to reading your latest post Lola, especially in light of the disastrous KP post of the children’s party with native music. How idiotic and ridiculous is this group from top to bottom? Everytime you think they might finally get going in a good direction….

  27. George was nit approached by children at the party. Kids that tried were intimidated by Will and Kate’s presence around him. George not shaking hands or doing the high five seems to a bit beyond shy. I get the first time…but after that they should have shown him. He did do it the second time an adult offered their hand…but he seems to be going down the path of anti social, very guarded, not friendly toward people outside his immediate circle…wondering if that is the sentiment he is picking up from his parents.

    1. Well, Kate shoved George away from her and Charlotte in public as they left Victoria (there’s video on YouTube). It’s clear he is the child they don’t love as much because he’s a boy.

      1. Ellie, I don’t know that I got that read. I did see that, but I think she was moving him so that they could position themselves for the cameras…she wanted to get into the picture so she shoved him over and angled her body it looks like toward the press…she is keenly aware of the cameras. Time again she can be seen looking right at the camera while the person speaking to her or where r she is near is not as aware that they are being photographed. Will seems less aware of pr, but kate seems to position all of them, for press…

        1. James Whitaker once said Kate Middleton is even more aware of cameras and plays to them more than Diana ever did.

          1. I remember seeing a video online about ‘Kate – the unfit princess’ and have found the link here…..
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3BncJtQlz94
            I have also found these interesting articles that also provide insight into what some journalists and observers thought of the royals / W&K- interesting thoughts from someone whom has worked for the press….
            http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/james-whitaker-listen-to-his-frank-insight-686771 and
            http://www.express.co.uk/comment/columnists/richard-palmer/367980/Palace-says-it-didn-t-ban-William-and-Kate-Christmas-pictures

          2. I recall an interview James Whitaker had with George Galloway evidently he didn’t think highly of Kate.I am rather sad that James Whitaker is no longer around cause I think he would tell it like it is about the Dolittle’s.

      2. I get the impression that, at least by W&K standards, George seemed like a difficult baby. Maybe fussy, cranky, demanding. Some babies have a difficult start, and it can be a parenting challenge, especially for people who expect life to be easy. For all his complaining, William seems pretty comfortable with George, so maybe he’s gotten past it, or maybe he doesn’t spend all that much time with his family (and can therefore be the “fun” parent when he’s there). But Kate doesn’t seem to have connected well with George. I think Charlotte, by virtue of being the “easier” baby is preferred.

        Then again, I honestly don’t think Kate seems particularly bonded with either child, but that’s another discussion. George just seems to be more sensitive.

        1. Kate told the public via the NZ playdate that William wasn’t around during the first 6mths of G’s life. The quote was along the lines of having to cope as a single mother.

          The few times the baby was seen, he was super grumpy leading to headlines along the lines of ‘Prince Grumpy’. And every time William talked about him during that period, he only ever mentioned his crying and nothing else. It later transpired via a sugary PR article from Katie Nichols about his weaning at 6mths that he wasn’t being fed enough and was often hungry hence his crying.

          I think once he stopped crying (after being fed properly), William was able to tolerate him and spend time with him. It took William some time to stop refering to him in negative terms in public or to stop calling C easier compared to G.

          I think after the shock of the first baby, C was an easier baby. And with experience under their collective belts, were able to handle C better. That’s always the way with the next babies after the shock of the first one. Any more babies are always a breeze comparatively.

          1. I think William and Kate would have found any baby a shock, regardless of its temperament. Neither one of them has cared for another person in their lives; on the contrary, they have both been pandered to since day dot and continue to be similarly treated. As such they both give off an immature vibe even now; William not being able to be near his son for the first few months or prioritise his welfare above his own is just pathetic. Of course, they had nannies to do the grunt work, but still found it difficult. I wonder why these nannies or Carole had not worked out that George was simply hungry? Imagine if they had to cope with full-time jobs, mortgages, and the daily grind of life!

            1. When that article came out referencing baby’s hunger, i side-eyed the experience of all Kate’s helpers. She had a maternity nurse for the first month, swiftly followed by Nanny Jess who was papped with them overlapping that month and Carole was involved from day one and deputised to help when the nanny could not. Not to mention yhe defcon 5 nature of medical care received by all royals, even if they are suffering from a simple hang nail.

              And no one sported the baby’s hunger for 6mths?

              No one listened to his cries. And i don’t mean that in general terms. Babies’ cries have different tones and pitches according to need. Listening to them will usually establish what they need. And if you are unsure, you check everything!!!

              Anyhue, we’ll find out for sure in 30yrs what horrors were visited on the kids when one of them whines about their bad parents just as Charles and William gave done.

              1. I agree with the side-eye. I remember the article and also remember thinking that it was plausible on the surface but stopped making sense once you scratched the surface. My own child had a rough start, and we made it a priority to figure it out. We read, researched, and asked questions. In a little over a month, we made the necessary changes and had a very happy baby after that. But it took them six months for them to realize their son was hungry? Either there was something else going on – and hunger was used as an explanation – or W&k were using their time-honored tradition of ignoring the good advice around them. But given Kate’s willingness to seek out advice at events, I’m not sure about this, unless she learned from the experience of George.

                Also, yes, to the questions about the care-takers and the inability of a group of people honed in on a royal baby being unable to deduce that he needs more food. All around, that’s a new low in observational skills.

                1. If breast feeding was being used as the excuse for low appearances then why didn’t the number pick up significantly if he was being weaned then?
                  Not to mommy judge, but if the recommendation is a year and she doesn’t have a job that interferes and the baby is still crying because he is hungry, then why start weaning so early? Plus vaguely using this as an excuse after that for the low charity appearances?
                  What a racket.

                  I just feel bad for the kids. They will be a messed up as their parents.

                  1. It’s a racket all right. Kate and William would use any excuse to wriggle out of anything approaching work. They really started ‘using’ their children early. Maybe Kate denied George food because of her own strange ideas about food. Given her history to date, the only conclusion to come to is that Kate Middleton is lazy and selfish to the bone. Ghastly woman.

                    1. I’m with you Kitty and wonder if Kate is pushing her ideas on food to the kids. Wasn’t Kate quoted somewhere saying that Charlotte is always hungry?

                    2. Not sure, Cathy, but let’s hope the children are permitted to eat what they need. I’m sure they are looked at very regularly by pediatricians so any hint of poor health would be picked up smartly.

                  2. In my long ago nutrition classes in high school, we were taught that children should be weaned at six months, but one must be vigilant for hungry ones who need more than mother’s milk who should be fed other food from 3mths onwards.

                    There wasn’t a strict timeline for when to wean as it depended on the child’s hunger, but emphasise was placed on being vigilant from 3mths onwards and to have started the process by 6mths such that the process was compleye by 9mths.

                    1. Where I am, the recommendation for breastfeeding moms tends to be at least a year, if possible. And if breastfeeding exclusively, absolutely no solids until six months. The recommendations are different for babies that are formula-fed, however. Solids tend to be introduced earlier and babies weaned sooner.

  28. Dear Good Morning America, People magazine, and twee blogs (Hello Giggles & Refinery 29, I’m looking at you),

    Kate Middleton is *not* Princess Kate. Her correct title is Duchess of Cambridge, but if you insist on calling her a princess then she is Princess William. However, Waity, Chutney, Waste of Space, and The Mattress are all also acceptable.

  29. Looking forward to reading Dear Lola hearts take on the episode of the Holiday Tour of Canada … it definitely was fashion focused all the way … change of outfits constantly is unreal when its supposed to be a Royal Engagement in Canada … They certainly act as if they are celebrities camera ready makeup hair ready dress change look to the camera again for next facial guffaw and pretend speak … What speeches did Waity do .. none that we saw she just stands like a cardboard cut out mannequin ..
    totally useless …
    its a joke really at least Prince Charles and Camilla act Royal and do so much work constantly under the radar..
    they make a difference but these two will most probably go back into hiding in Norfolk for the next months ….

    1. I’ve read reports that Waity’s wardrobe for this trip cost $80,000 – $100,000 (I’ve read both figures). I guess that includes shoes, jewelry, purses, etc., but that is an unbelievable amount! Her looks, which I don’t find all that spectacular, are all she has to offer. Very sad.

      1. They included several things she already owned eg 2 pieces of jewellery (earrings worn at arrival + charm necklace worn on the last day) which totalled approximately $48K. If you subtract these 2 items, her wardrobe total isn’t so bad for it’s stated costs.

        Of course most of it was bespoke, so would have cost a lot more than the stated price tag, so there is that….

  30. Loler, if I was British that is how I would pronounce your name, have you been under the weather, and if you are I hope you feel better ?

  31. I think this Canadian tour killed Lola from the shear boredom. Just start writing about Harry, Lola, we understand!

  32. Ah just when you thought they couldn’t say anything else on the holiday/tour of Canada ..with the two useless twits.. they get praised in DM saying what a success the tour was … ugh.. what a load of sheer rubbish in article.. As we all know all we saw was a constant flow of make up costume hsir changes during the engagements to make sure she was camera ready fake smiling etc.,
    how on earth do they think the mannequin could possibly serve as queen when she contributes square root of zero to us taxpayers ….Unbelievable in the truest sense of the word …

    1. I realize it is the ar$e-kissing DM, but unfortunately the bar is set so low for these two that some people will actually believe the article. In some people’s minds, they can do nothing wrong because of Diana, and they are the two most special, smartest, beautiful, in love, best parents ever. Yuck

  33. Anyone see this pic – they look so awkward and more to the point uncomfortable in it….
    http://duchesscambridges.tumblr.com/post/151430873595/the-duke-and-duchess-of-cambridge-canada-2016
    on all their other post tour pics they seems to be ‘holding’ each other – now I am not one to start more gossip…..but the mere fact they are standing ‘miles’ apart from each other suggests a little more than the reported troubles in paradise are afoot…. he looks bored she looks waxwork with that smile…. and more to the point yes it may be a nice coat but it wears here not she wears it.

    1. If I didn’t know any better, I would think Madame Tussaud’s had just updated their Waity / Whiney exhibit!

  34. GingerMini you are hilarious! Princess Beatrice went to a hospital to promote eye health. I think it was in Asia, I could be wrong? Personally I think Bea did a great job! The princess spent 3 hours at the eye hospital. To bad it was not promoted by the media?

  35. Yep Halia
    Princess Beatrice is doing well at least she stays 3 hours and does good .. what do the Cambridges do stay for minutes smile at cameras and skip away… flashing at cameras .. hair makeup is it camera ready shoot .. and walk away they are just cardboard cut outs doing a whole lot of nothing

    1. I’m glad that she’s being made to do work (such as it is), but my cat would be a better diplomat than Waity. Of course any real work will be done behind the scenes, and Duchess Dolittle will get the credit, as per usual. I have to think that the 2 pictures used in the article are The Telegraph throwing shade – her stupid horse guffaw laugh, and the almost flash at the play date in Canada.

    2. Considering she didn’t say a damn word publicly during the Canadian tour, I don’t know how effective she would be regarding trade talks. Besides, she has yet to say anything that demonstrates she could even understand those complex issues. She isn’t even aware enough to wear British designers more often in order to promote them.

      There are British ministers that can do the job much to help deal with Brexit. Getting Kate to lead trade talks is like the US getting Kim Kardashian to work for them. And at least KK has some experience in promoting products, even for her own personal gain.

    3. I doubt she could ever be considered a ‘potent force’ given that the media are still given little to nothing to write about other than her fashion. As I quote from the Telegraph broadsheet newspaper ‘if Britain is engaged in a pre-Brexit charm offensive with EU nations, it will have few ambassadors as effective as the Duchess’ – so she decides to wear an outfit by Catherine Walker (a French born designer), shoes by an Italian designer – and only the clutch handbag by a British Designer!

      Even the BBC (British Broadcasting Cooperation couldn’t muster anything worthwhile to say about Brexit. There were no speeches, no visible talking to people that matter (the King of Netherlands has no political powers)….all just talk about a pair of pearl earrings…..

      It just looks and sounds like a jolly abroard to see a few paintings and nothing more…..

      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/10/11/duchess-of-cambridge-meets-dutch-king-on-day-of-soft-diplomacy-o/

      http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-37622731

  36. No surprise here, but today she wore those ghastly nude court shoes again! It makes me want to scream. I wish her stylist would point her in another direction. There are plenty of other appropriate footwear options. Why won’t the woman deviate? It’s like she has no imagination. BORING!!!!!

  37. Hi Lola
    I see from your twitter feed that I’m not the only one thinking Kate is trying to channel Angelina Jolie?

    Kate:
    http://i3.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article9022184.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/OCT-07–The_Hague_Netherlands_Britain_Royals_PDJ103.jpg

    https://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/thumbor/zP3EHhxn9Y8aRGJrzQqqZUclswo/fit-in/1024×1024/filters:format_auto-!!-:strip_icc-!!-/2016/10/11/702/n/1922398/723f88fd88f0c4f1_GettyImages-613926668/i/Kate-Middleton-Netherlands-October-2016.jpg

    https://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/thumbor/_y0N3jbRbW_aGDEDcp6MR76nQFg/fit-in/1024×1024/filters:format_auto-!!-:strip_icc-!!-/2016/10/11/701/n/1922398/6c1cea2f8f9119e8_GettyImages-613927504/i/Kate-Middleton-Netherlands-October-2016.jpg

    Angelina:
    https://lovelace-media.imgix.net/getty/456987892.jpg?

    http://4.fotos.web.sapo.io/i/o69026556/17483341_foVNa.jpeg

    Let’s hope she’s not trying to channel Diana again?
    http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/08/08/article-2185426-002B253400000258-487_306x566.jpg

    https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/0c/be/a5/0cbea5337070f842101a20f4552ba7b9.jpg

  38. Absolutely everyone she copies either Diana or Angelina with the hair up … Difference between Angelina is this lady very smart kind to her charities.. Waity Cambridge hasnt got the intelligence or ability that Angelina does without thinking … Waity is arrogant and rude and thinks everyone is beneath her and is also just a fashion peg who got there by being a mattress ….
    and stalking her way into the firm .. now its all about what this peg wears and really nothing else .. How on earth do they think she can be an ambassador for our country when all she has done on royal engagements is show her knickers countless times we have lost count..
    how this can be allowed to continue with her not speaking in speeches is just unbelievable. ..
    we have no time for this pair as they are beyond arrogant in the way they behave towards people

  39. I do too hope that Lola is alright – one can only imagine she is bored stiff of trying to think creatively about these two selfish muppets….

  40. i am beginning to wonder if she has been threatened since Obama handed over rights of the internet to an International authority, or she could be really ill. If you are reading this Ms Lola, and you are sick G-d speed with you !!!

  41. Ah so pleased dear Lola that you fineb
    can understand how you are bored by it all .. I think we all are as we say same things about the lazy duo

  42. Hi Lola I’m new to your site, I was wondering do you report on the other royal families? or is it only the British royal family your report on. By the way I love your site.

  43. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3848772/Duchess-Cambridge-stuns-patriotic-poppy-dress-joins-Queen-Harry-Wills-reception-Olympic-Paralympic-heroes.html

    So it wouldn’t surprise me if she (somehow) makes it onto a best dressed list at some point between now and Christmas. HOWEVER, in this ghastly getup I cannot figure out whether or not she has been ordered to dress so dowdily or whether or not this is her new style…..or that it is the style of her new stylist….

    One word can describe this -‘get-up’ – hideous

    1. One thing stood out looking at these pics……. William and kate towered over Ellie Simmons, Harry got down to her level to speak to her. They are both rude and ignorant,
      I think the dress is hideous !

  44. Overpriced fluff, and boy do she have lottsa teeth !!! Has anyone had a conversation about may-be downplaying the drama, poor Chutney she either goes over board with the maniacal expressions or looks so bored she looks like she is ready for a nap. I believe there is a happy medium, I’m wondering if after 5 and a half years, if she will ever find it !!!!

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