Tag Archives: Kate Middleton Jelly Bean

Kate’s Haunted Hair

Not only is a leprechaun living in Kate Middleton’s knee, she now has a hair ghost.

While watching clips of the Taj Mahal visit, I noticed a woman’s face appear several times on the side of Kate’s head.

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Judging by the state of Kate’s doll hair, this is no polite paranormal passenger, this is one pissed-off poltergeist occupying her tresses.

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While Kate’s hair being haunted sounds ridiculous, it does explain why Amanda Cook Tucker doesn’t do a better job blending Kate’s wiglet, she doesn’t want to linger too long out of fear she’ll get sucked into a follicular alternate dimension.

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Of course, there’s a perfectly rational explanation for Kate’s hair ghost face, it’s called matrixing or pareidolia.   The human mind, forever in search of order, seeks to identify patterns it recognizes from shapes.  It’s the psychological phenomena behind people seeing ghostly faces in old mirrors that have some of the backing chipped off or Kate Middleton on their jelly beans.

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Nothing about Kate is rational, though, so I’m going with hair ghost.

Meanwhile, the lackluster royal bore tour continues to haunt the Cambridges.  The Sun published a scorcher of a piece by Emily Andrews.  It was a further behind-the-scenes glance into the tour in the unflattering light of candor.  Andrews’ article describes a tour lacking in warmth and sincerity that was so focused on the photo ops that, “As Kate and William were just about to leave their hotel in Bhutan to have dinner with the country’s king and queen, guests were told to move out of the way as it would “ruin the choreography” of their departure.”  Andrews also indicated there’s a reason so few of Kate’s comments made it into the news, “The Palace would rather you did not know.”  According to the article:

Indeed, some of Kate’s comments were banal at best and clumsy at worst. Meeting a chef who had been badly injured in the Mumbai 2008 terror atrocities, she murmured: “It must have been a surreal day.”

And when speaking to charity workers helping India’s street kids, who are mutilated to make money begging, she managed to utter: “Gosh, so interesting.”

They say you can’t fix stupid, but you can certainly try to hide it for as long as possible.

Normally William and Kate disappear after tours but events are already showing up in their calendar. Kate went missing for more than a month after the last one.

Today Prince William, along with Harry, will be touring the Star Wars set.  On Thursday, they will likely be part of the Queen’s 90th birthday celebration and on Friday, William and Kate will be hosting a private dinner for the Obamas at Kensington Palace.

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